“Welcome to RoilandTV.com”
I’m Justin Roiland and this is my website. Thanks to my pal Rob Harris, I now have a place on the internet to house all the horrible things I’ve created in my miserable time on this depressing, dying planet. It’s all here. My complete master works.
Now, you might be wondering to yourself: “Hey wait a minute here! I’m pissed! Just who in the hell is this Justin Roiland person anyway?” Well you know what? You’re right, you should be pissed because I’m a nobody. I’m nothing, capiche? I’m a joke. Nobody. Nothing. A joke. Nobody. Etc.
But seriously, I’m great! I’m good! I’m great! Just check out my IMDB page so I don’t have to sit here and type a bunch of boring credits = (IMDB LINK) See?! Now you’re like: “Wow! How come I never heard about this Justin Roiland guy before? I’m a really attractive 18-25 year old girl and I’d totally let him have his way with me and I’d be really aggressive about it with him too, I’d just throw myself at him etc.” Whoa! Easy! There’s plenty of me to go around ladies! Just take it easy! There’s plenty of me to go around! Take it easy! But actually, I’m just kidding around. I’m not a playboy. I’m not all sexualized like that! Just who do you think I am? What kind of person do you think I am anyway? I’m not all sexualized like that! What’s the matter with you? But seriously ladies, there’s plenty of me to go around. Just kidding. I’m a stand up kind of guy. etc.
I hope you enjoy this website. I’ve collected everything in one place here for easy access. You can find all episodes of The Grandma’s Virginity Podcast, all my cartoons, TV pitches, Channel101 shows, and a bunch of other odds and ends. I also plan to produce new content for RoilandTV.com. New animated shorts, new characters, new comics, and new ongoing series. You know what? I’m sick of typing this about page. I don’t have anything to say and I feel like I’m just typing a bunch of nonsense. This is your fault. Look what you did to me. Look how you made me feel. I’m sick of typing this and it’s your fault that I had to type it. I just want to play minecraft right now. I didn’t want to type this. I feel like I have a cold now too. This is all your fault. I just want to play minecraft now. That’s all I want to do, thanks to you. This is all your fault. I’m sick with a cold now, etc.